
The Impact of October School Events on Co-Parenting Arrangements
Co-parenting or “shared parenting” allows parents to work together as a team to raise their child, even if the parents are no longer married, in a relationship, or living together.
A Texas co-parenting agreement tries to balance a need for clarity with the messiness of everyday life. While your co-parenting agreement may spell out many rules and expectations, it can’t address every situation – like when your child develops an interest in soccer, earns a spot in their studio’s top dance class, or wants to go to the Homecoming dance.
October is full of school and extracurricular events that, at first glance, may conflict with a co-parenting arrangement. Here are several tips to help parents navigate these events successfully.
Fall School Events That May Conflict With a Co-Parenting Arrangement
Autumn school calendars are full of events that can change the regular flow of your co-parenting schedule. For example:
- After-school sports practices may affect which parent needs to pick the child up from school. Your co-parenting agreement may have assigned this duty to one parent assuming a normal end-of-school day pickup time – but the later sports pickup time may prevent that parent from doing the job.
- Late-night school events, from back-to-school nights to concerts, games, and dances, may require parents to work out who will transport the child. These late-night events may also call for the child to stay with one parent, even if the time “belongs” to the other parent. For example, if one parent lives close to the school, it may make sense for a child coming home from a late Homecoming dance to spend the night at that house.
- School volunteer events may call on a parent to arrange transportation, drop off donations, or participate in volunteer activities. Organizing time and transportation efficiently may call for the child to stick with that parent.
- Sports matches and arts performances may require parents to organize their schedules so that both parents can see the event, even if they don’t wish to see one another.
Add tasks like doctor’s appointments and back-to-school shopping, and autumn becomes a whirlwind of events that can disrupt your typical co-parenting schedule. Parents who are ready for the change can implement tools and strategies to navigate it more easily.
Ways To Support Your Child During Fall Events
Autumn school and extracurricular events can feel extra challenging when they conflict with your co-parenting routine. The following tips can help you support your child and navigate this season successfully.
- Communication is key. Maintaining clear communication channels between parents is the best thing you can do for your child. You’ll be able to discuss sudden schedule changes, double-check what your child tells you about their schedule, and demonstrate to your child that adults can work together respectfully when something matters – like them! If face-to-face communication is difficult for you, consider maintaining a text message thread, email thread, or family group chat to keep everyone on the same page.
- Share information immediately. When your child brings home a flyer or permission slip, take a photo and send it to the other parent so you both have the same information. Forward school emails. Sharing information directly minimizes the risk that either parent will misinterpret the other’s summary of that information – or accuse the other parent of omitting or changing essential information.
- Plan ahead. As soon as you have a copy of the school calendar, sports calendar, or other events calendar, compare it to your schedule. Note dates on which a change in co-parenting routines may be necessary. For example, if Homecoming falls on a weekend your child would ordinarily be with their other parent out of town, reach out to suggest the child stay with you in town for Homecoming and spend “your” next weekend with their other parent.
- Give kids a system for keeping track of essentials. For instance, you might assign two backpacks: One for daily school items and one for sports equipment, dance clothes, sheet music and instrument-related items, and so on. Your child can more easily manage the things they need for fall events when they know exactly where their things should go and how to access them.
Speak To an Experienced Texas Family Law Attorney for Assistance
Co-parenting requires a willingness to learn new skills, from time management to emotional regulation. It doesn’t come naturally to many people, and it is not taught in schools. Yet the benefits of a strong co-parenting relationship help both the parents and the child.
Whether you’re navigating an existing co-parenting arrangement or anticipate creating such an arrangement, don’t hesitate to speak to a knowledgeable Texas family law attorney. The team at the Law Offices of Jason Wright can help.